Charlie is a very astute sailing instructor. However, once in a while he forgets some of the more important terms involved in sailing instruction.
One day he found a book in the local marine store that he knew would make his job easier and would enlighten his students no end. It turned out to be a sailor’s bible and he carried it everywhere. It’s called ‘The A to Z of the Sea’
Here is a sample of what he learned:
Albatross: A large seabird found mostly in the South Seas. It was made famous in the Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Coleridge where he immortalized the seaman’s superstition that it was extremely unlucky to kill one. They are delicious when pan-fried, barbecued or roasted
Charter: A very important sounding word that means to rent (a yacht or ship). Unsuspecting tourists are lured down to the Caribbean and other exotic locations by cleverly designed brochures and web sites in order to get them to part with their hard earned money. While sailing from bar to bar they quickly become addicted to the locally brewed rum and can’t remember a thing when they get home. The good thing is that they always go around telling everyone they had a fantastic time because: a) They want to make their friends jealous, and b) They’d look pretty stupid having spent all that money on a horrible time.
Entry: When arriving in a foreign country you must go to the port of entry and fly your yellow quarantine flag. Then the medical officer from that country is supposed to inspect the vessel for Ebola, the Black Death, gonorrhea, syphilis etc. The practice has waned a lot in recent years. All the medical officers have either fled or have died.
Equator: A horizontal ring around the middle of the earth. Designed as a separation zone for undesirables from the antipodes.