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Absurdities

The BVI’s Trellis Bay is a beautiful and protected anchorage. It’s right next to the airport and when the runway was being extended there was a fear that yacht masts would interfere with planes taking off and landing. The bay is fairly shallow and some bright spark in the civil service suggested that if the bay was dredged this would lower the yacht masts and solve the problem!! They must have brought in an expensive consultant because later they decided to cordon off the area instead.

There are many absurdities that happen in small Caribbean countries. In the BVI it isn’t illegal to drink magic mushroom tea—but get caught smoking ganja and you’ll likely get a thousand dollar fine. Get caught doing a bit of fishing without a license and you could get thrown in the slammer for a year!! 

In Grenada recently there was a grand celebration with top Chinese officials attending. A sports stadium was being officially opened: it had been funded largely with Chinese money. The ceremony opened with a marching band in full regalia, polished instruments gleaming. Their first (and last) number was the Taiwanese National Anthem!!

Citizens and ‘Belongers’ have preferential treatment in the BVI, and it takes at least twenty years residency before you can humbly apply. All jobs must be advertised for weeks in the local press before the job can be offered to anyone else. Ad seen recently in the press: “Island Restaurant Requires Donkey. Candidates must be able to eat carrots, bray loudly and stick head through hole in door. Accommodations and carrots included. BVI Belongers Preferred.”   

There are often ads in the classifieds ‘Personal’ section for boat owners seeking likely mates….. often with (unstated) romantic intentions. Some are pretty obvious like this one. ‘Captain looking for female crew. Should be under forty, a cunning linguist, fun loving, unreserved, good figure, love skinny dipping and playing games…like ‘hiding the salami.’

A more genuine one seen recently: Captain looking for boat and female crew. Please send photo (of boat).

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